Monday, December 20, 2004

Giving in

I gave in today, i gave into her and whatever she wanted to keep some normality in life. As little as that might be. But still who knows whats for the best, we can only wait and hope for the best whether we know if the future is looking dark or not.

On a lighter note my PC design has finished and if anything it can only go down in 5 months time. Another possibility is that in 5 months time a grand will get me a flashier PC. Either will suit me perfectly and i can cross those bridges when i get to them. Saving up the money is my main priority i guess. My next paycheck will be slightly fatter than the one i got last time around. Regular pay + £57 tax rebate + overtime pay = one step closer.

AAAAnd to put a downer on the post i have to goto a presentation evening tonight. Where they rant at us for an hour or two till we fall asleep or it finishes about our GCSE results or something. I dont think my parents have even remembered, they still havnt asked for my school report yet. They might get is christmas 2006...maybe...

Sunday, December 19, 2004

Indecision / She was the girl that cried dry tears...

People have more of an effect on other people than i first realised. I fist realised this last night when in less than 30 words i made Emma dry retch through streaming tears, begging me to stay with her and refusing to physically let go of me till i stay with her. To this moment i dont know what to do, let alone foresee anyway i'm gonna be able to remedy the situation pain free for anyone. I guess going to Wales for a few days might help things can only make things clearer...

Thursday, December 16, 2004

CBA/TBH Part 2

God bless free periods and the homework flexibility they bestow upon us. If it wasnt for them i could be doing HWK right now! The horror! I'm filling my time with online checkers/chess instead. Its just about the only games I can play on this imported rust bucket from my parents work, enough to get me online I guess. I'm talking to more old aquantences (sp?) online now, god knows why but its good to keep in touch with old friends. Spunge did a song about it i think, Roots it was called...i think...
For no reason other than a need to express creativity i keep thinking about little short films i'd love to make. Obviously they're just thoughts on a whim but they could be made in so many different ways, real life, flash, or maybe just in words...anyway, i guess my visions are too narrow and unflexible to ever be put into practice. I have images in my head and if they wouldnt come out like i see them then i wouldnt be happy. I can tell. Ah well, la vie es belle.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004


Apathy is something i resort to a lot. A less posh word would be laziness. Sheer plain laziness. Cant be arsed, to be honest. Scraping a post together is tough enough. I rang the inland revenue about my tax but they're lazy lazy post people have a 2 week back log to get through, which means my money will arrive along with my next pay-cheque. Funnily enough my next pay check will be for 5 weeks as opposed to 4, meaning that instead of 250 ish it'll be nearer 400. Should i choose to spend as little of that as possible, my PC would arrive even sooner. Still fifty quid down to my rents tho, and with 70 in the bank i'll have to watch my pockets till january. Thank god i've got all the presents i want.

I'm not known to be the most organised person at college, i'm known to be a lazy SOB with a file worse off than a suicide bomb after-mess in an Iraqi market. Its THAT bad. I'm seriously gonna have to take it to Wales after Boxing day to sort through and get everything in order etc. Then after that its time for some well earned pwnage on San An, should i get it...Ah well, we live in hope.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Cash Strapping And Sketching For School

Well, college actually. The college newspaper is out every week, or whenevr they can get enough writers to pull together enough articles to pad out a few sheets of A4. So me and a friend decided we should do a comic for the paper. Nothing big. We toyed with the idea of having it multi-panelled but found that our sense of humour suited a single frame with a single gag. That and we couldnt be arsed doing 3 or 4 drawings a time.
I'm also attempting to build a PC. Or rather, attempting to design a PC i'll build when i can get the cash to afford the parts. The damn Inland Revenue owe me £57 the thieving gits...not that THAT will be enough but i'm £50 down to my parents anyway so it will only help. Hell, if you had £57 stolen you'd bloody well want it back wouldnt you?

Thursday, December 09, 2004


Life is so busy at times and at others it can be as dull as Dishwater. Exam pressure, HWk schedules and life in general can only ever get better. There always seems to be one major thing in life thats up. Not that i'm telling you lot. My Ebay complaint came through. Rather, my DVDs arrived today by pure chance. And in a cruel twist of fate i cant have them till the 25th, gutted... I LOVE YOU EMMA (i'm certain) just to keep the missus happy. And i mean it as well, baby. :)

Ebay, Schmebay

I've been let down a lot in life, many times...since i'm only 16 i'm expecting more to come. But in the past 2 weeks i've ordered numerous items through Ebay (damn addictive, i need a cure!) and the only one to arrive was the last one i bought. Needless to say i'm gonna be sending off unhappy e-mails to the sellers and should i get no reply, leave a scarring feedback and investigate. *Smoulders with generic rage!*

In lighter views i think my addiction to web-comicry has gotten worse. Yay! Ah well, didnt want to start a blog on such a negative note. And i'll leave it on another plus.

I LOVE YOU EMMA! (i think :P)

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Victim of Ignorance...

I'll explain the title first. I'm a victim in two senses of the word. A victim of my own ignorance and a victim of other people's ignorance. My own ignorance is nothing I can complain about and make sense at the same time, i've turned myself into myself and have only myself to blame. I wont go into the details of why i am like i am but i'll just say that i dont like the person i've become. In fact, wait a minute, i do like the person i've become, he's just got a few major flaws is all.
The other ignorance i'm exposed to day by day is those of my parents. They arnt god fearing or even unique. They believe anything that they're told, they're gullible, old fashioned and i'm sick of them. In 2 years time, i'll be gone. Thank god.